Fuck the ruin you've made of my hometown. You can have the dumpster fire you've started. I only hope that the sprawling homeless / methfreak / scum barge you all are captaining runs aground hard a few miles short of the outskirts I'm fleeing to. Fuck your bike lanes that cater to the six percent of the city's self-righteous asshole population, fuck your goddamned wine shops, eleven dollar "artisan" burgers, and your DIY "art" galleries which apparently exist only to furnish a platform to the untalented. Fuck your imported pretense, displacement of the populace, and faux radicalism.

In short, Fuck YOU, Pseudofornia.

RIP Portland. - It was fun while it lasted and it was an interesting place to grow up. I am saddened at your demise.